I’ve had enough of Among Us memes

The never ending torment of being out of the loop. That is exactly how I felt when suddenly everyone in my class started playing this weird mobile game based on the movie “The Thing”. Basically in the game there is a select number of ‘impostors’ who are trying to sabotage the space trip of the ‘crewmates’ by killing them or destroying life support systems. It seemed boring to me so I simply ignored it.

After I got home I turned on my PC to look at some memes on reddit, but to my horror it was all Among Us memes. It consisted of people arguing whether it should be written as “amongst” or “among”, calling people impostors and clips of the game itself.

\-It’s just a trend, don’t worry, I’m sure it will pass soon.

I thought to myself and began my journey in search of people who also weren’t interested in the game, to my surprise there was no such person. I looked everywhere on the internet, I even went to ask my parents but when I opened the living room door they were watching Among Us on the TV. I was lucky they didn’t hear me, because a few seconds later I heard them talking:

\-I wonder what our sussy baka thinks about amogus! – my mum said.

My dad quickly responded with:

\-I’m sure he was on the trend way before us, after all it’s not like he has a choice.

This was followed by a sinister sounding laugh from both of them which quickly subsided.

I was now severely creeped out by how everyone who had internet access was a big fan of the game.

\-That’s right! – I screamed to myself, but my parents didn’t care and were still obsessed with the gameplay displayed on the TV.

Only people who had internet could possibly know about it, but then where do I find people who don’t have internet? I mean, even the poor kids in class knew about it. I’d have to go to Africa or the Middle East and I don’t have an interest in getting bombed.

After sitting there for a bit I got an idea. I can just look at some poor people getting bombed to relax and hopefully forget about it. I found some videos, but to my absolute horror the bombs exploded in the shape of an Among Us crewmate when they hit the ground.

\-What is this Minecraft fireworks type shit? – I said to myself quietly as to not arise any suspicion from my “parents”.

I immediately started playing L’s theme from Death Note to increase my IQ by an additional 300 points.

\-It would seem that everyone is suddenly obsessed with Among Us, but for what reason? Some sort of pandemic? No, germs don’t spread that fast, also I would’ve been affected too. The only possible explanation would be mind control, it’s probably those damn Gargozalions again… – I said while reaching into the drawer to my right and picking up a pair of goggles.

\-Let’s see then, where are you hiding? – After putting on the goggles I immediately spotted one 6-legged creature with a lion’s tail sitting in the corner right above my desk.

\- Sneaky fuckers, since they can’t control my mind they’re trying to make me go insane, now what shall I do about them?

After a few seconds of thinking I came up with a plan, I decided to spread a meme which contained a mathematical formula that would and make the person want to spread the meme further, but also override their control and destroy the Gargozalions brain after a while. The quickest way to spread it would be to make the meme Among Us themed, since they love this game oh-so much.

Now all that’s left to do is to post this meme on Facebook and wait for Mother Teresa wannabes repost it all over the internet. I’m not going to lie, it was pretty hilarious seeing my overly religious aunt wondering which amogus crewmate is the sussiest based on their ass sizes, but sadly all good things must come to an end.

How would I get rid of them from the poorer countries where there is no internet though? Well, all I can do is hope that their new amogus overlords bless them with a lot of rain so their dry-ass land can finally be used for something.

Overall, I’d say that the Gargozalion extermination went quite well, it might have caused a civil war… or 24, but we don’t talk about that. At least most African countries have finally united so we might begin to see some development on that front, who knows, maybe they’ll make a second China with cheap labor and human rights violations?

\-None of that is of matter to me however. – I thought to myself as I laid down in bed and went to sleep after another successful day of dealing with all that crap.